14. 17 years of existence and my father is not always around

     It was never easy growing up in this kind of situation because my father is not always around. As a boy growing up, having your father around is important because you need a father figure. My mom was the real MVP, she stood in for my father who was assigned in Mindanao. I do not know how she does it, but she was able to guide us her three children while also looking after her parents.  Have you ever experienced not having your father around during special occasions?  Most especially on your birthday? What would you feel?

          I’m used to this kind situation. I remember when I was a kid I used to cry a lot because my father was not present on my most special day, my birthday. It really broke my heart because I am a “daddy’s boy.”  We can only have our father to celebrate with either on Christmas or New Year, but not on both days. Their duty is to serve the country and this is 24/7 so each soldier has to wait for their “break” so they can go home to their families. That was always the situation in my elementary days. Whenever he goes home, I would literally jump for joy. The saying, “absence makes the heart grow fonder”, is something I can relate to.This is the price of all the assistance or benefits from being a military family – you have your father always on the field to keep the country safe and secured from danger.Growing up I have slowly accepted our situation. I began to appreciate the little things in life. Seeing your father drinking his coffee and reading a newspaper already puts my mind at ease and soothes my heart.  From all these dramas, I am already thankful and blessed to have a father. I may not see him often but it is nice to know that he is out there. Unlike other kids like me who don’t even know their father.

    In conclusion, living in a military family have their pros and cons. The benefits may give an outsider a view that we are living a rosy life. However, the military values that we have to live and not having your father around all the time will make you think twice.  My father is not the only soldier in the family, me and my siblings can also be considered as soldiers. Similar to him, we are fighting a war within ourselves every day.We are always afraid and nervous about what may happen to him on the field. To me, if something happen to him this will definitely leave my heart with a wound that is deeper than a gunshot wound.